My Feelings…

My Feelings

We were denied SSI again and I don’t know why! My family and I need that money. My Brother, Tommy is 14 years old and has Autism. We need that money to help us with getting Tommy a babysitter or a nurse when he needs it. My family consists of myself (Clara,19), my Dad (Tom), my Mom (Kenna) and my brother (Tommy, 14). With the economy so bad couldn’t everyone use the money right now? Yes, money… the little green paper that allows us to eat, sleep, use the restroom, and even play video games. Green paper that makes the world “go round”.

Life has become hard on us because there have been so many times when I had to eat ramen noodles for both breakfast and lunch. I have not gone out shopping fornew clothes since Oct 15th of 2007. It is hard to hear others talking to me on my cell phone even with the volume to the max. It drops my calls every so often. I can’t even text on my cell phone. You guessed it, my cell phone is prepaid.

I take care of my brother Tommy by babysitting him almost everyday. My Mom and Dad have always worked long hours. My mom works as a cashier at Ghirardelli. My Dad works as a cashier at the Kangaroo gas station. Sometimes, Tommy will do unnatural things and I don’t know what to do when he acts like this. He once pooped in a box and then threw it in the toilet. Tommy will every so often get dressed in the living room. He will grab himself between the legs in public. I don’t know what to do when he acts like this. Tommy will say things like “poop the rainbow out of your belly button”, and “shark *****”, poop shucar”, and “hang you off”. When Tommy talks like that, I don’t understand a word he is saying. This can be very frustrating for me.

As for my life, I play a lot of video games because I am stuck in the house most of the time. I play games like any of the Final Fantasies, ninja games, and some of the Sims games. I also read a lot of books mostly Manga like Death Note, Dot Hack, The Twelve Kingdoms, and Bleach.

This Saturday I was hoping to go out clubbing with my friend Cristin. This would have been my first time going out clubbing. At first I was a little scared, but then after that I was all up to it. Alas, I can not go out because I have to watch Tommy. I feel that I have a responsibility to take care of Tommy, but, I feel that I should be able to go out and have fun every once in a while! I am 19 years old and going to collage full time at Everest University. Am I wrong for feeling this way? Where is help for my brother, myself and my family???

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